[テスト投稿] Talking again with my ex – am I being a fool? -1-

My boyfriend and I were together for a long time,
but we broke up last November
because we both had some problems from our past
that made it hard for us to be happy together.

It was really sad for me
because it was my first time going through a breakup like this.

We had broken up before,
but then we got back together a few months later.

We used to live together,
but he moved back to his parents’ house
after we broke up.

He came to pick up his things a week after we broke up
and then again two months later.

I didn’t want to bother him
and waited for him to come when he was ready,
but my friends and my psychologist said
I should tell him to come get his things earlier.

When he finally came,
I asked him why he didn’t come earlier.
He said he was having a hard time
because he didn’t want to remember our time together,
and that’s why he waited.

We talked normally both times he came over,
and we still get along well.

He asked if we could still be friends,
but I said I wasn’t ready for that yet.

He apologized and said it was a dumb question.
I told him maybe we could be friends later
and see how it goes, and he agreed.

My ex-boyfriend and I,
who are both 23, broke up last November
after being together for 8 years.

We had some problems in our relationship
that made us act out in negative ways.

It was tough for me
because it was my first time experiencing such heartbreak.

We actually broke up before, 5 years ago,
but we eventually got back together
after months of talking as friends.

It’s been a confusing time for me lately.

He moved out of the apartment we shared
and went back to live with his parents.

He came to collect his things
a week after the break-up and took what he needed.

He came back two months later
to collect the rest of his things,
and we haven’t been talking much since the break-up.

My friends and therapist told me to tell him to get his stuff earlier,
but I didn’t want to pressure him.

When he finally came,
I asked why he took so long.

He said it was tough for him to come back
because of all the memories in our home.

We talked like normal during his visits,
and he asked if we could be friends.

I told him that I can’t be friends for now,
but maybe in the future.
He agreed to that.

My ex boyfriend broke up with me in November.
We had been together for 8 years (we are both 23).

During the relationship many of our childhood triggers came up,
which caused us to sabotage the relationship –
it was also the classic anxious-avoidant dynamic.

I was really heartbroken as it was my first true heartbreak.
We have been broken up before,
it was 5 years ago.

Then we stayed “friends”, continued to talk daily
and just ended up back together months later.


It has been quite a confusing time for me.
We lived together and he moved back to his parents’.

First time he collected his things was a week after the breakup,
he took all his essential things.

The other things he came to collect two months later.
During this time we weren’t in contact.

All my friends and my psychologist told me
during that time that I should tell him to collect his things

but I wanted him to come when he was ready
(I tend to be a people pleaser).

When he came, I asked him why he didn’t come earlier.
He said that it as been a difficult time for him

and he didn’t want to come to our home
as it would bring up some memories
and he just pushed it forward.

Both times we talked like normal
and we do get on well.

He asked if I wanted to be friends with him
and I said I couldn’t, at least not for now.

He said “sorry, that was a stupid question”.

I said, maybe later,
let’s see how it goes.
He agreed.

この文は、恋愛関係中に、二人のうち少なくとも一人が幼少期のトラウマに直面し、その結果、関係を自己妨害してしまったということを述べています。

また、この関係には、一方が不安になり、もう一方が避けるという典型的なパターンがあったようです。つまり、相手に近づきたいと思う一方で、同時に相手を避けたいと感じることがあったということです。

We faced many of our childhood issues during the relationship,
which led us to unconsciously ruin it.
It also had the common pattern of one partner being anxious while the other was avoidant.”

Our past childhood experiences affected our relationship
and caused us to damage it unintentionally.

Additionally, one partner in the relationship was often anxious
while the other tended to avoid confrontation or distance themselves emotionally.

「Dynamic」は、何らかの相互作用や相互作用について述べるときに使用できます。

When you play tag with your friends,
you run and chase each other,
and your relationship becomes dynamic.


When you and your family members eat dinner together
and talk about your day,
the family dynamic becomes warm and loving.


When you and your classmates work together on a group project,
you share ideas and help each other,
and the group dynamic becomes collaborative.

The dynamic between the two leaders was tense and strained.

The dynamic of the group changed when a new member joined.

I noticed a shift in the dynamic of our conversation
when we started talking about politics.

この文脈で「sabotage」を使用するのは自然です。ここでの「sabotage」は、「妨害する」や「台無しにする」という意味で使われています。この文脈では、二人がお互いに幼少期のトラウマや感情的な傷を抱えていたため、その影響で関係が妨げられてしまった、という意味になります。

ここでの “triggers” は、過去のトラウマや苦い経験などが引き起こす、感情的な反応や行動の要因を指しています。つまり、「引き金」として機能している出来事や状況、あるいは思い出が何かしらの反応を引き起こしている状況を示しています。

このような場合には “triggers” が適切に使用されています。もし “triggers” を使用しない場合は、「幼少期の傷やトラウマによって引き起こされる過去の経験に関連する問題」などと表現することもできます。ただし、”triggers” の使用が適切な場合も多いため、この単語を使うことが一般的です。

例えば、仕事が忙しくなり、家庭生活や趣味の時間が減ってしまったときに、「It has been quite a confusing time for me.」と言うことができます。また、自分自身の感情や考え方について変化があったときにも、「It has been quite a confusing time for me.」という表現が使われることがあります。例えば、「最近、自分の人生の方向性について混乱していて、何をすべきか分からない。It has been quite a confusing time for me.」と言うことができます。

It’s been quite a confusing time for me lately,
trying to juggle my work and social life.
I feel like I haven’t had a moment to myself in weeks!

I’ve been having a bit of a confusing time lately,
but I’m trying to stay positive
and focus on the things that make me happy!

A: Are you thinking of quitting your job soon?

B: I’m not sure yet,
but at least not for now.
I want to see how things go for a little while longer.


A: Do you want to move out of the city and live in the countryside?

B: That’s something I’ve thought about,
but at least not for now.
I have a lot of work and commitments in the city
that I want to focus on first.


A: Are you interested in dating anyone right now?

B: Not really, at least not for now.
I want to focus on my career and personal growth
before getting into a relationship.

A: Are you planning on trying that new restaurant that just opened up?

B: Yeah, I think so.
Let’s see how it goes.
If we like it, we can go again.


A: Do you want to try rock climbing with me this weekend?

B: I’m not sure if I’ll be any good at it,
but let’s see how it goes.
Maybe I’ll surprise myself.


A: Are you nervous about the upcoming job interview?

B: A little, but let’s see how it goes.
I’ll do my best and see what happens.